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    I have β€” on several occasions β€” created Gmail accounts, posing as a friend's dog or cat, and sent them trolling emails.
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    I'll pretend to be on the phone when walking passed canvassers but then carry on the fake conversation for fear of being found out.
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    There exists footage of me dancing to Aaron Carter on the show All That.
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    After consulting with my head of EPA as well as many park rangers, please be advised that the United States Government will no longer recognize...
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    ... any animals as "endangered" or "on the brink of extinction" and will hereby be lifting all hunting restrictions...
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    ... so that all game is fair game. Our hunters must not be burdened by regulations and must instead be swift with the trigger. Thank you.
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    So many thoughts on this one....
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    1. Is this a big enough problem that it warrants a billboard?
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    2. Is a billboard the best way to reach the target demographic: children who can't read?
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    Bergen, Norway, for adventure
    August 4, 2016
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    Sweden, for 5 days of kayaking & camping
    August 13, 2016
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    Yosemite, for @TheDeena's birthday
    September 10, 2016
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    I'm walking around Prague with @malielfman who's a huge Escape Room fan and what do we see but a brand new escape room!
    Built in a 15th century basement, themed like a torture chamber! Awesome!
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    We joked as we were lead down into the basement that this is how all Hostel movies start: a couple of American friends find a slightly creepy tourist attraction, get lured into a basement, and then tortured.
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    Anyway, at one point you end up with a metal grappling hook attached to a rope β€” like, an actual metal grappling hook β€” that you need to throw over a wall and pull on to unlock a door.
    Artist's rendition of grappling hook.
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    This is the Grand Budapest Hotel, right?
    I know it's the wrong country, but like... right??
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    v v casual with the weed. Exhibit A.
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    Exhibit B
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    Flak-jacket Kushner
    No question, this will be the #1 costume this year. Unless - and this is highly unlikely - more weird stuff happens with the Trump Family.
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    Barring more information, people will just wear the weirdest shit they can imagine and then respond "I'm a Covfefe"
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    Handmaid's Tale hat & red robe
    No chance @joemurphy wont be wearing this on Halloween
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One of the many things that's recently been inspired by @jeremysomething
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    🌼🌼🌼🌼🌼🌼
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    It's a Canadian tux sort of day
    Special thanks to Jeremy for teaching me the right way to take these photos β€” all about that right hand crossover.
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    Seafoam carpet for the Pirate's premiere
    Worth noting: ran into my dentist at the premiere, "I also do Johnny's teeth" so there's that.
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