How I Met Your Mother, 2050 Edition

What we'll tell our kids
  1. We shared an UberPool.
    Used the Spotify playlist I paired to the car as our wedding playlist.
  2. I right-swiped her, she right-swiped me.
  3. Saw she was a Postmates driver...
    Ordered wine, The Notebook on BluRay, and condoms.
  4. I was a Genius, she had cracked her Apple Watch display.
    Fixed it then sent her my heartbeat
  5. Were both invited to the private beta of List App back before it had 3 billion users.
    She made a list "my perfect man is..." I took note.
  6. Started talking via Virgin's in-flight chat service.
    Sent her a bento box of cheese, fruit, and nuts.
  7. I stumbled on her Kickstarter video asking for money to fund her album...
    Donated $1000 for the reward: A Day in the Studio with Me!
  8. Saw her selfie while browsing Instagram's discovery tab
  9. I was a mod on an obscure Subreddit, she was a frequent poster.
    /r/loveatfirstpost
  10. Randomly paired up on Words With Friends...
    Had to spell out my phone number because their spam filter wouldn't let me message it.
  11. We were guests on the same podcast.
  12. I saw her Instagrams via the wedding hashtag
    And made a point to introduce myself at the day-after brunch.
  13. I stayed and fell in love with her beach-side bungalow on AirBnB
    3 months later, we were living there together.
  14. "Are you using that outlet?"
    I asked, as we both waited for the same flight.
  15. Tesla auto-pilot malfunctioned and I rear-ended her.
    Used the settlement money from Elon to pay for the wedding & honeymoon.
  16. I crashed my drone in her backyard
    Note: not a euphemism.