Inspired by @bjnovak's hunt for a new mattress.
  1. Mattress
    You spend more time on your mattress than in any other one place (source: this list) and yet, when it comes time to buy a new mattress, how do you know what to pick? Do you keep detailed notes regarding all the mattresses you've slept on? Is laying for 20 second on a mattress in a store - fully clothed, without sheets - really a good indication of what you prefer?
  2. Toasters
    Is there anything worse than making toast with a new toaster? The settings aren't standardized and that's a serious issue. Whoever creates the iPhone of toasters will become a wealthy and praised person.
  3. Car stereos
    There are like 3 smart phones in the world: the iPhone, Android's knockoff, and that other Android knockoff. Why can't we have car stereo systems that play nicely with these? Why are all car interfaces reminiscent of the Treo?
  4. Gyms
    No one loves their gym. If you love your gym, you go to Equinox West Hollywood and are part of the problem (source: I used to be part of the problem.) This concept of a monthly membership to some inconvenient place with a bunch of strangers where you haphazardly move big chunks of metal until your podcast ends is so dated. Props to Class Pass for trying to break the mold.
  5. Spas
    Why is a massage at least $100/hr? I'd pay that for a haircut, but that lasts me a month. Why do I have to get in my car, drive somewhere, get all relaxed, then drive back home after I'm all relaxed? Where's the Uber or massages at a lower cost? Props to Sooth for the Uber part and Massage Envy for the low cost part - now if only they'd combine and work out all their flaws (like subpar massages.)
  6. Airline travel
    Why does it still take 5 hours to get from LA to NY? That's how long it took in the 60s. Why is airport security worse than it's ever been (with the exception of TSA Pre which is like being a member of the Stonemasons.) Why are we all sitting in tiny rows like a bunch of jackasses? Can't we at least get the comfort of a train where you can walk around, enjoy the dining car, etc.? Why do airlines think "clever" safety videos are enhancing my flying experience?
  7. Automobile travel
    I will be the first person to sign up for a self-driving car.
  8. Segway travel
    JK my dad got one of these when they first came out and they're perfect. Don't change, Segway.
  9. Clothing
    Why is bespoke still so expensive? I would think given modern technologies it would be relatively simple to program my measurements into a manufacturer's system and produce ready made made to measure pieces. No? I'm already ordering everything offline (sorry, brick and mortars) why can't I just send the internet my measurements and get back some custom threads (for the same price as ready made)
  10. Female urination options in public
    Peeing is a time for respite. Not for shame-quiver-squatting a thousand feet above a toilet. WE WANT ANSWERS
    Suggested by @thebfg
  11. Showers
    Like, really showers? It's been a hundred years and I still gotta suffer through ball-shriveling cold and skin-melting heat while nudging the nob a fraction of a millimeter at a time to find the right temperature?
    Suggested by @stephen
  12. Staplers
    This seems like a pretty basic operation. Yet 90% of staplers can't manage more than 2 pages. Electric staplers are a bit better but why so loud? And shouldn't there be an easy way to predict where the "electric staple" will end up - upper left corner shouldn't be so hard on a consistent basis.
    Suggested by @dball
  13. Contractors.
    90% of what happens they won't offer up info on unless you ask and everything is a scam. They are built to fuck... you over.
    Suggested by @Ders808
  14. The breastpump
    As @johnnyartpants described them- they are like two hoses hooked up to a lawnmower on one end and and two cones you put over your boobs on the other. I suspect cows get better technology for milking. Oh and guess how much they cost.... The best one- that is only slightly quieter and more efficient is $100/mo to RENT or $1200 to buy. My phone is less that than and it holds all of human knowledge and can let me send emojis of poo to my friends.
    Suggested by @lexzie