Looking for Investors... Vol 1

For some businesses I'm hoping to start. Serious inquiries only!
  1. Snipples - Topless Salon for Men
    Many men do not enjoy getting haircuts. Many men do enjoy topless women. Sounds like a perfect fit! Imagine a Hooters-esque establishment combined with the timeless styling of a barbershop. Seeking 1M in initial funding plus an additional 10M to help cover inevitable harassment lawsuits.
  2. Froyo Baggins - LARP meets Froyo
    People love frozen yogurt. People love Lord of the Rings, Game of Thrones, and other mythical franchises. Why not combine them? Fool proof idea. Trademark Flavors: Gandalf's Graham Cracker, Molton Mordor Milk Chocolate, and My Precious Vanilla Tart
  3. Espress Yourself - Coffee Shop
    I've done some market research: Starbucks. CBTL. Peet's Coffee. Seattle's Best. Costa Coffee. It appears people love coffee. People also like expressing themselves (i.e. Twitter, ListApp, Facebook) Behold: a coffee shop WITH free WiFi so you can express yourself while espressing yourself. Game changer.
  4. The Next Facebook
    I saw The Social Network twice and listened to an NPR story about Bitcoin so I'm ready to become a digital entrepreneur. SERIOUS INVESTORS ONLY! This new Facebook I'm creating is guaranteed to produce 400x investment returns within 6 months as a result of a super-tight logo I've spent the last 3 months designing. Seriously, it's dope.