Things Rappers Never Brag About (but Should!)

  1. No cavities!
    Oral hygiene is tight
  2. Good MPG
    I don't care how expensive your car is, what's your carbon footprint?
  3. Providing health care for their whole crew
    When you say "my whole crew is taken care of" does that mean it's like a single-payer health care system?
  4. Drinking responsibly
    You know what's more impressive than getting turnt up? Enjoying two glasses and then stopping.
  5. Having a meaningful conversation at the club
    On a Tuesday, or not. Whenever, really.
  6. Foregoing an expensive gift and instead making a charitable donation in someone else's name
  7. How smart their bae is
  8. Being a @KCRW monthly member
    Even if they were, you know they're not opting for the Los Angeles food bank...
  9. Being punctual
  10. Choosing a perfectly ripened avocado at the supermarket
    Seriously worth a brag - how is his fine, @gabimoskowitz ???
  11. Good posture
    Scoliosis ain't nothing to laugh at. You'd have to pack heat, specifically a heat pack on your back.
  12. Settling a beef in a calm and peaceful manner