FIGHTS I'VE LOST TO MY WIFE
- •How many of these cookies I should eat right nowI'm so angry that my pants still fit. I wanted new pants!
- •She said I'd really like Veronica MarsAnd now I'm binge watching I Zombie.
- •You should join Instagram...and now I've posted 200+ more photos than she. But, at what cost? I could have been doing something meaningful with my time.
- •Hey I think we should get a dog...and I'm now so happy I'm not picking up dog poop every day