THINGS I'VE NEVER EXPERIENCED AS A SOUTHERNER BUT REALLY WANT TO
- •Going to school in the snowKiss my ass, Snowpocalypse.
- •Being able to differentiate New England accentsI think I've got Boston down but the rest is just a muddle of aggressive barking.
- •Having a Jewish friend or just knowing any Jewish people at all reallyWe even have a lot of Muslims now, at least in Birmingham, so it's safe, I promise!
- •Life not revolving around footballOr would I have to deal with another sport I don't understand?
- •Less racist people?I know it's a problem everywhere, but maybe Northerners would be less inclined to ask if I'm related to any other Asian person they know.
- •Taking a casual road trip to CanadaTo go camping or to see Niagara Falls or to get booze since I'm 18 or all three 🍻🇨🇦
- •Polite but indifferent strangersI don't mind holding doors open for people, but I'm also too socially awkward to carry on a thirty minute long conversation about your nephews I'll never meet just please stop talking to me yes it's great he got into Samford but I don't know what else to say