1. 6th grade, math class, watching Surf's Up because it's the end of the school year and who gives a shit about anything anymore
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  2. That penguin who's won a lot of surfing competitions is showing off his collection of trophies which he refers to as "his ladies" to show he's that big of a d-bag by literally objectifying women
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  3. Soft music that came straight from a badly lit amateur porno starts playing as he presents each trophy with a deep, husky (creepy) voice
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    "This is Jill"/ "This is my lady Amy"/ "Shaniqua"/ "Therera. This is Theresa right here...dirty girl."
  4. He then points to this empty spot and says, "This spot? This spot is for my special lady...Liya."
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    Do you remember how badly you didn't want people to look at you in 6th grade? I do.
  6. "I'm going to say that one more time. Liya. Ohhh yeah that's a sweet, sweet lady."
    The name written on the script was surely "Leah" or maybe "Lia" but it might as well have been "Liya" considering the very personal hot surge of embarrassment I felt.
  7. Everyone snickers and giggles. My teacher makes some sarcastic but lighthearted remark. I don't say anything and look down at my empty desk.
  8. The moment passes quickly but the redness in my face does not.
    6th grade Liya could not take a joke.
  9. So that was one of the most embarrassing moments I've ever endured, and I've had a lot.
    Although most of them don't involve being sexualized by a penguin.
  10. If that happened now I think I'd just groan and laugh along with everyone else, so at least I've made substantial progress with my crippling self consciousness! 🙃
  11. I'd also laugh cause, who am I kidding, Surf's Up is one of the greatest movies of all tiiiiiiiiiiimmmeee brah
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