Conversation Starters

Use any of my patented lines from this list when approaching strangers at a party or social gathering. Each is guaranteed to provoke an exciting and interesting conversation.
  1. Dolphins are the most narcissistic creatures in the animal kingdom, am I right?
  2. Wine is actually just Grape Pee-Pee
  3. The best song ever written is "The Boys are Back in Town"
  4. Yogurt is for nerds.
  5. Did you murder my Aunt Lucille?
  6. Let me smell your Palm
  7. I take a yearly vacation...to my butt hole.
  8. My turtle committed suicide last week.
  9. Which way is the shitter? Don't worry I don't have to go. Just wanna watch.
  10. Stop looking at my shoulder, you pervert
  11. Daddy, can you come back home now?