[🇺🇸] GREAT MOMENTS IN LIMITED, CONSERVATIVE GOVERNMENT

  1. •
    "Oh, this necessary medical procedure means I'm in debt the rest of my life? That's fine. Nobody tells me how to healthcare!"
  2. •
    "Gary, is your water brown? My water's brown. And smells like petroleum. Huh. I guess that's freedom."
  3. •
    "Gentlemen, today I am introducing a bill that will once and for all protect semi-automatic weapons as historical landmarks and/or an endangered species..."
  4. •
    "Listen: I know I know I know I know ... but what if corporations WERE people?"
  5. •
    "Yeah, I know I know I know I know ... but what if embryos WERE people?"
  6. •
    "Of course, yes, I know ... but what if gays WEREN'T people?"
  7. •
    "Yes, yes, I get it, "business conflicts" ... but what if we DIDN'T have an independent ethics committee?
  8. •
    "No, I see your point, but what if we GOT RID OF scientific data? And scientists."
  9. •
    "No, yeah, definitely ban all Muslims, totally—but what if we let SOME in who we do big business with?"
  10. •
    "No, actually, this is perfect: what if we say, 'No, yeah, it's totally a rigged system," and then make it a bunch harder for ppl to vote?"