1. My parents had 2 dogs before I was born. We still had them when this story happened, but this story is not about them.
  2. Because I wanted my own pet.
  3. And so when I found a slug in my backyard, young Lauren thought "YAAAAASSSSS."
  4. I used a novelty sprinkler and grass to build a home for the slug, and to protect him from birds.
  5. I loved him.
  6. I named him Sammy.
    Sammy the Slug.
  7. I would go out and check on him all the time.
  8. One day I went in to talk to my parents about how well my pet was doing.
  9. "I think Sammy really likes his home - he's all warm and fuzzy!"
  10. Sammy had been dead the whole time.
  11. I was parenting a dead slug.
  12. Who had molded.
  13. Soon after my parents got me a cat.