REASONS I AM NOT PERFECT FOR ONE DIRECTION ACCORDING TO THE ONE DIRECTION SONG "PERFECT"

  1. I do not "like midnight driving with the windows down." Where the heck are we going at midnight? Can we at least roll the windows up to save my hair?
  2. "Causing trouble up in hotel rooms" sounds like something I will be billed for.
  3. If we're "going places we can't even pronounce," am I going to need to update my passport? Are we staying in a sketchy AirBNB? Did you at least Yelp some local cuisine?