A Comprehensive List of my Skills
I'm turning 29 soon and with that comes that unavoidable question: What have I done with my life? So I decided to compile a list of the things I'm good at. The results were... less than reassuring.
- •Acting antisocial in social situations
- •Acting social in antisocial situations
- •Making strangers uncomfortable
- •Knowing when my roommate needs to use the bathroom based in his facial expression
- •Being annoyingly observant
- •Waking up my sleeping daughter, but only when I am making an effort to be quiet.
- •Breaking my toes on every piece of furniture in the house.
- •Wasting an my entire day away on Reddit
- •Typing 100 words per minute
- •Breaking phone chargers
- •The ability to burn nearly anything I cook
- •Making an awesome quesadilla (when I manage not to burn it)
- •Never getting enough sleep
- •Unskilled labor
- •Memorizing the lyrics to annoying kids songs
- •Losing myself in daydreams while putting off my responsibilities
- •Memorizing wrestlers finishing moves
- •Smoking way too many cigarettes