A material girl, living in a material world...
  1. I have a tooth implant.
    Thanks for this one grandma
  2. Some people call me the white Beyoncé.
    And by "some people" I mean me.... I think of myself as the white Beyoncé
  3. If there was a movie made about my life, Rebel Wilson would play me.
    She is my sister from another mister (she just doesn't know it yet)
  4. My sister is a wannabe stripper.
    Her stripper name is "Trixie" and we have traveled to the Red Light District to pursue this dream of hers
  5. I am a serious dog lover.
    "Beth I didn't know you had a heart until I saw you try to make out with that puppy..." -a close friend