RULES OF DATING ME

  1. use turn signals
  2. read assembly instructions
  3. avoid small talk at all costs
  4. cry if you must, just no weeping
  5. no screaming
  6. no drooling
  7. no fainting
  8. no tripping over
  9. your mood should almost exclusively be, but not limited to, chill
  10. no speaking in German
  11. never cover up your freckles