TOTALLY NORMAL CONVERSATIONS I HAVE WITH MY PARTNER
- •How the British tabloids found out about my partner's affair with the queen and subsequent booty crown he wears around the house.
- •Pigs are lucky because they become bacon. People should be used to the fullest extent just like animals when we die.
- •My partner being turned on by androgynous singers when he was younger.
- •The merits of the reverse strip tease. You can just leave!
- •Stop gyrating and go.
- •Recommending using a golf club in a thunderstorm because eighties movies.
- •Spoon emojis and lack there of.