Out of Fashion Expressions I Still Use

New expressions crop up all the time but I refuse to abandon perfectly functional older ones just because some overly cool hipsters decided to float a new one out there this week.
  1. Fetch
    I “only” liked the movie Mean Girls since it was a bit derivative of Clueless and Heathers but I really loved some certain things in the movie, particularly the idea of deliberately trying to make a catchphrase happen.
  2. Awesome sauce
    First of all, I love the word “awesome” and then the sound of the two words together flows so nicely. Plus it always reminds me of that perky and adorable insurance commercial with the twin sisters. I don’t usually say it in conversation, because people would probably look at me like I was strange, but when I want to amuse myself I’ll whisper “Awesome sauce” to myself. Either that or “Tots Magoats” or maybe “Kewl”.
  3. ".....not so much."
    Example of usage: “I love most of the characters on Blackish. The two little kids are hilarious. The mother-in-law…. not so much.” I have been using this phrase since I first heard it on the television show “Mad About You”. I’m not sure if it originated there but that’s where I came across it. The delivery of the phrase by Paul Reiser was so perfect.
  4. “I’m just saying.”
    Same thing- a phrase I loved from “Mad About You”. Everyone uses this these days, even if they don’t know about the show. I’m just saying.
  5. Cool Beans
    Another one that is fun to say, even if it makes no sense. I’ve never thought of beans as being particularly cool, not even compared to other vegetables. I mean, it’s not like they are a tomato or a potato, the rock stars of the vegetable world that are involved in most food dishes.
  6. “a [blank] …. from hell.”
    As in “She’s an ex-wife… from hell!” This is usually attributed to comedian Richard Lewis, which makes sense to me. He uses it expertly.
  7. “As if”
    I think “Whatever.” has usurped this one but “As if” shows a little more incredulity and disbelief whereas “whatever” is so totally non-committal that it seems pointless to even use it since you are expressing your utter lack of concern about the subject. You could just have grunted an “Eh” instead of bothering to utter any words.
  8. Book/Booking
    I think this used to be popular in the 1970’s. I use it sometimes just because I’m amused that a term used to express speed and motion (“Let’s book over to the movie theater.”) is also the method people use for leisurely story-telling and vicarious escape.
  9. Boinking
    I think this is a totally made up word that me and my friends used as a euphemism for, you know. We compounded that onomatopoeia-ism further by moving onto “scrump” which was used only by our friend Kendall, and by us when we wanted to tease him.
  10. Hip/Hep
    Sometimes you just have to throw in some old people words to cleanse the palette. Consider it a #TBV (Throw Back Verbiage). I don’t think hip people ever referred to themselves as hip though, at least not the truly hip ones. They were too cool for that. Then when the phrase “hep cat” came along, it just got really silly. When you are too hip to use the word “hip”, find something else altogether instead of some derivative of it. Still, it’s fun to dig it out of the 1960’s archives.
  11. Jiminey Crickets
    My go-to swear word when I was a kid. I tried to be a straight arrow and not curse but sometimes when you get angry or exasperated, you have to let fly with a swear-ish sounding phrase that doesn’t get your mouth washed out with soap, which happened to me exactly once. On the plus side, when you toss out “Jiminey Crickets”, the person who is making you mad usually stops what they are doing and says “What did you just say? Did you actually say ‘Jiminey Crickets’? Are you like 70 years old?”
  12. Ridonkulous
    When I want to express that I find something to be stubbornly, donkey-ishly, ridiculous and I’m incredulous that it is actually happening. I apply it to situations, not women’s anatomy, like some people do. For example, the Republican Party’s field of candidates is ridonkulous. They can’t all seriously think they are have a chance to win the nomination, can they?
  13. Good Googly Moogly
    What a high school girlfriend used to say back in the day when she wanted to express disbelief without saying “Are you shitting me?” Plus it is fun to say too when you are confronted with a fantastical situation. Kind of like when Flavor Flav expresses enthusiasm about a positive experience by saying "Yeaaaaaah booooy!" Well, this is for unbelievable situations that haven’t quite morphed into ridiculous/ridonkulous situations.
  14. “Can you hear me now?”
    I only say it sarcastically though.
  15. "Do, or do not... There is no try."
    When I want to remind myself that I need to put forth an effort if I want to make something happen. So what if a puppet said it. It is still true.
  16. Hella / Wicked
    When “cool” or “awesome” have been used too much already today. You can only use it once in a while though, like once a week, or people will think you are affected and deliberately trying to be hip, which isn’t hip.
  17. Dude
    I’m not sure when “dude” became commonplace but between The Big Lebowski, Dude Where’s My Car and that scene in BASEketball, dude has now replaced “Hey, man” or “bro” as the way to address a friend casually. I’m comfortable with “dude” and dude-ittude and would be happy to never hear “bro” again, especially if “bro” is conjoined with “-cation”, “-mance”, “-seph”, ‘-time” or “-‘s before …”. Dude is a chill way to let someone know you are talking to them and they have your attention.
  18. "Let's roll."
    It feels so street gang-ish, like I’m a character from The Warriors. Oh, and I randomly will say “Warriors, come out to plaaaayyy.” I sometimes interchange that phrase with “Let’s bounce”, not because I’m feeling particularly urban but because I love the Tom Tom Club song “Time To Bounce.”
  19. “I’ll be back” and “Hasta la vista, baby!”
    Who hasn’t quoted an Arnold Schwarzenegger movie line? I like these from Terminator and T2 and I also like one from Kindergarten Cop that I use to tease a friend of mine. Every time she says she has a migraine, I say “Maybe it’s a tumor?” to which she of course replies “It’s not a tumor. It’s not!”
  20. Spiffy
    How I imagine a 1970’s kid would describe his new neato new bike bell.
  21. Shiny
    The sci-fi series Firefly used this frequently and it sounds like a cooler version of spiffy.
  22. 1940’s Noir expressions
    I will sometimes juice up a conversation by using phrases like “The dame was trouble with a capital T,” “He pulled out a gat and the lead started flying,” or “He beat feet to his jalopy and tore out of there,” and the occasional “Fit him for some cement shoes.” It is fun to talk like a private dick.