QUESTIONS I HEARD CHILDREN ASK THIS WEEKEND

I live in Brooklyn, so there are a lot of children.
  1. "Is dog puke green?"
  2. "How many pairs of shoes do I have?"
  3. [Stage whisper] "Do you think she is going to give me a flower from her bouquet?" (I did.)
  4. "Am I pretty in this shirt?"
  5. "Can we have hot dogs for lunch?" (Dad said yes.)
  6. "Do you want to buy this for me?" (It was an entire chocolate cake.)
  7. "Will you make fish lips so I can hit your face?" (Sounds confusing; maybe I'll demonstrate next time we see one another.)
  8. "What's my favorite kind of juice?"
  9. "Is she in trouble?"
  10. "...am I in trouble?"