RIDICULOUS COOKING TASKS I INSIST ON DOING

Um, it tastes better this way?
  1. Making my own butter
    Okay but it's not actually that hard with a food processor. I used to do it with an electric paint mixer! Five gallons at a time! Uphill both ways!
  2. Cooking exclusively with dried, not canned beans
    This is really just because I do not own a can opener.
  3. Crushing coffee beans in a hand-crank burr grinder
    My neighbors hate me.
  4. Rinsing and roasting the seeds of every winter squash I cook
    Snacks are a good thing to have handy at all times.
  5. Frothing milk for coffee in a sauce pot with a whisk
    I guess I like doing extra dishes.
  6. Carrying all of my lunch elements in separate glass jars
    "Have several heavy, breakable containers on your person at all times," I always say.
  7. Rendering my own lard
    But I'll be honest, only when I can get my hands on some good fatback.
  8. Steeping looseleaf tea in a pot; never in bags
    Don't even say the word "microwave" to me, brah
  9. Making small-batch simple syrup for DIY soda
    Flavors currently in my fridge: rosemary and honey-sage. I'm such an asshole.