Hurry -- I have to leave soon!
  1. Do I really have to bring anything if I wear this hat?
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  2. This inflatable snowman would have the distinct advantage of being the largest gift.
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    Now I'm thinking I should have deflated it before I tried getting it in the car.
  3. This festive Snowman Pillow is adorable, no?
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    The cat's done with it, so might as well pay it forward.
  4. They probably already have an elf, but I could bring a shelf!
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    Every year, believe it or not, I'm the only guy who brings a shelf.
  5. How hard could it be to make a festive Gingerbread House?
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    Saltine crackers for walls, mayonnaise for snow, Advil pills for Christmas lights -- this'll be easy.
  6. Perhaps I could deliver a dramatic reading of "A Child's Christmas in Wales."
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    Everybody says my Welsh accent is purfuct!
  7. Is it appropriate to wear and then leave a Christmas tie?
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  8. Can you eat cranberries raw?
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  9. Could this be my chance to unload the clock that plays Christmas carols on the hour?
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    I particularly hate it from 1 AM to 6 AM.
  10. What says Merry Christmas like 387 poetry collections?
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    I could put them in a festive bag!