THINGS I SAID WHILE WATCHING MY NEIGHBORS PLAY GRAND THEFT AUTO FOR THE FIRST TIME

I am apparently "no fun"
  1. "Do you get to pick your person's outfit and stuff?"
    My motivation for doing just about everything
  2. "Why did you just kill that person? They weren't doing anything wrong."
    Apparently this is the point of the game
  3. "Do the policemen exhibit any racial biases?"
    Topical, but not appreciated.
  4. "Could you please stop making him jump off buildings the thud sound is a little too lifelike"
    *shudders*
  5. "So now that you're giving that person a ride are you gonna chop them up into little pieces and scatter them around L.A."
    Apparently THIS suggestion a la Criminal Minds was crossing the line
  6. "Why would you want to do that, they're just trying to work to survive"
    In response to Jordan saying you can beat up strippers
  7. "Can you have him buy an art studio and have him build sculptures?"
    *i did not actually say this, but I thought it the entire time