1. "Let me get onto your wifi so I can send this Snapchat."
  2. "Is this Skrillex? Shazam it."
  3. "I love it when my Uber's a hybrid."
  4. "Hashtag FTW"
  5. "Blardlegook Hgpang"
    In fairness that one's total gibberish today too.
  6. Donald Trump might be our next president.
  7. "What was the name of that movie he was in? Let me just check IMDB real quick."
    Suggested by @simplyshelli
  8. "Let's use my selfie stick for this and post it to Instagram."
    Suggested by @migmags
  9. Wanna Netflix and Chill?
    Suggested by @pili_ervin
  10. "I think he's at Coachella but let me check find my friends"
    Suggested by @emg2613
  11. "LOL that's what she said"
    Suggested by @estherlimtf
  12. She's given up on Match and is now just Tindering.
    Suggested by @cordeliane
  13. I wanted to airdrop this from my iPad to my iPhone but my Bluetooth isn't working
    Suggested by @LauraM
  14. My dad looked up MILF on Urbandictionary. So not dope.
    Suggested by @pili_ervin
  15. Let's cut the cord and get Apple
    Suggested by @k8zinker
  16. I'm working tonight. I have to live-tweet an event.
    Suggested by @edhyndman
  17. I'll just wait until it's on Netflix so I can binge it
    Suggested by @Hluti