WAYS I'VE LOST A CELL PHONE

RIP 14 cell phones between 2005 and 2009
  1. It fell out of gold lamé bra-top on Halloween.
  2. I set it on the beach at nighttime and then couldn't figure out where I put it despite repeatedly calling it and looking for the light.
  3. I brought it with me in a crew boat during a highwind advisory and our boat sank.
  4. I dropped it off a 5th floor balcony in Las Vegas and it snapped in half.
  5. I "Gift of the Magi"ed it, returning it on day 29 of the 30 day grace period to get money for Christmas presents.
  6. One second, I had it in my highschool boyfriend's Ford Explorer and then, the next second, I just never saw it again.