SUCCESSFUL DIRECT MESSAGING STRATEGIES FOR SEXUALLY ACTIVE MEN

Sliding up in a girl's DMs is an important way to get to know a lady. Here are tips on how to do it right.
  1. Say "hello!" Girls love that!
  2. Send a haiku about how funny they are. Girls like poems!
  3. Claim to be a dead president. Lincoln is too obvious; McKinley is a more believable bet.
  4. Send a photograph of a detail of a Renaissance-era painting of a dick. This will show you are cultured.
  5. Send your Social Security number, to show you believe in trust and government safety nets.
  6. Be Drake. Being Drake almost always works.