WAYS TO GUARANTEE I SWIPE LEFT ON TINDER
- •Only photos are selfiesDo you have friends or are you a sociopath who keeps to himself?
- •Wearing sunglasses in every pictureDo you have eyes? I would like to see them
- •At least three people in each photoGreat. You've proven you have friends, but I don't know which one you are. Are the hot one on the left? Oh no. You're not. You're the hunchback on the left.
- •Photo of you as an 8 year oldI'm not a pedophile and would rather not try to decide if I'm attracted to you by seeing you 20 years ago.
- •9/11 Memorial PhotoNot cool, bro. Nothing sexy about almost 3,000 lives lost
- •This nip slip