On the Fallacy of Parental Favoritism

The only evidence you need to disprove favoritism is this gallery wall* constructed by my mother out of the purest form of love distributed evenly amongst her children. My parents never show their hand, and always play it cool.
  1. An 8x10 photo of their eldest, no doubt taken in the customer service department of a SEARS, circa 1987.
  2. Oh look, their second son. Truly the most talented of all the Kelly offspring. This 8x10 snapped in a Walmart studio is truly befitting of his future musical and artistic genius.
  3. This 8x10 of their youngest child, propped against what is surely a cardboard box with a plush blanket strewn atop it, is a•r•t™ in its rawest form. The unidentifiable stain on the top left corner adds jarring depth to the composition.
  4. what is this
  5. A 16x20 portrait of their only daughter, commissioned in Firenze, Italia on a trip where hope and light and beauty and love and joy were rediscovered in a post-9/11 world.
  6. She posed for an hour and a half on a bridge at dusk.
  7. God bless 🙏🏼
  8. *
    This wall is obviously just an aggressive play to ensure that I am the one who takes care of them in their old age.