I am about to get very personal and it scares me to death. To actually see this list...gives me chills. it's been my life for the last 3 years. when I discovered the awful truth. Addiction 1 - Me 0 The constant struggle of loving an addict.
  1. β€’
    Every day is exhausting for the family of an addict. Every day is another day you wake up and think..- is today the day? Will he get help? Or will the addiction win?
  2. β€’
    I am here.....do you even see the real me?
    Of course I do. You are the Never-ending cash-flow, I see you when I need you. I steal your cash, a little every day..i lie about it. I take your perscribed medication and cast the blame in any direction but my own. Why do I have to tell you where my money goes. You're such a control freak. I will spin every scenario to ensure you feel as though you are going crazy. All I see is the means to get what I need to feed my addiction. You are the perfect Patsy.
  3. β€’
    I am upset and overwhelmed.....don't you care?
    No, God yer so selfish. Why can't you just leave me alone for awhile. Your always bothered by something. I get high to drown you out. It has nothing to do with my mother who introduced me to crack when I was 16.
  4. β€’
    I love you fiercly....can't you feel it?
    No, I feel nothing for no one, not you, not my son that i am not allowed to see, not the two daughters i havent seen since i walked out in their mother, not even myself. The only thing I love is the high I keep chasing.
  5. β€’
    I hurt deeply....can't you stop it?
    No. I didn't hurt you. Its not my fault. Its all in your head.
  6. β€’
    I tell you my feelings....do you ever hear me?
    No, I'll use your feelings and twist them to make you feel bad for me. How dare you call me names and put me down, you are mentally abusing me. *(He thinks the word 'addict' is derogatory)
  7. β€’
    Why don't you just leave him?
    I love him. I believe in my vows. It's not easy. But like a good storm coming.. im getting stronger every day....and one day...I won't stay up all night worrying about him. I have someone more important to worry about. Me❀