I DON'T THINK WE CAN BE FRIENDS IF

  1. You don't like French fries
  2. Star Wars episode 1, 2 or 3 is your favorite episode
  3. You call it "the interwebs "
  4. You say "eXpresso"
  5. You say things like "I don't read, I watch tv."
  6. You poke me on Facebook