GUYS I'VE SLEPT WITH AND WHY IT WAS A MISTAKE

-the condensed list-
  1. Guy who was a bartender where I used to work
    Coke head who fucked me like I was his hand. I had whiplash for a week. Also he was a compulsive liar but ya know, details details.
  2. Guy who thought he was a better musician than he actually was
    Broke my heart, as musicians often do. I miss him but not his penis. I actually asked "is it in" the first time we fucked-something I thought only happened in movies.
  3. Guy who doesn't believe in going down on girls
    Sigh. I don't actually feel like elaborating on this one.
  4. Guy who I loved too much to have casual sex with
    Chose girl after girl over me, over the span of five years. The heart wants what it wants, I guess.
  5. Guy who took too much adderal
    Tried to fuck for over an hour but he couldn't keep it up. He was too embarrassed to talk to me ever again.
  6. Guy who had commitment issues....
    ....which miraculously disappeared when he met the girl after me.
  7. Guy who I had nothing in common with aside from the fact that we both found him attractive
    And of course he was a republican.