TOP TEN GOOD THINGS ABOUT THANKSGIVING FOOTBALL

From Thanksgiving Day
  1. 10. You can use it as an excuse to not have to spend time with your family.
  2. 9. It's the only way people will willingly watch a Detroit Lions game.
  3. 8. There's a good chance the Dallas Cowboys will lose in front of a national audience.
  4. 7. Without it, you'd still probably think it's Christmastime.
  5. 6. It'll probably inspire children to use the turkey as football and in turn inspire parents to ground their children.
  6. 5. Did I forget to mention the Cowboys could embarrass themselves on national TV?
  7. 4. The games will likely save you from having to watch... uh... whatever else it is TV networks play on Thanksgiving.
  8. 3. It's probably the only time of year when you say the words "touchdown" and "cranberry" in the same sentence.
  9. 2. It lets you forget just for one moment that almost everything else that happened in sports this year sucked.
  10. 1. All of the football action will make you get away from Brooks Bannister's lame lists.