Because 4-6 months is just long enough to ruin you forever!
  1. Flinching whenever you hear the name of any of your 147 celeb ex-clients
  2. Having really strong opinions on everything pop culture, but only for August-December of 2013
  3. Remembering zac efron's pant size forever
  4. Extreme skepticism about the authenticity of award shows
  5. Inexplicable fear of E News
  6. An apartment full of gossip magazines - again, only from 2013
  7. One wonderful story about the day John Lithgow came into your office and yelled at your boss about childrens' birthday invitations
  8. Explicit knowledge of the differences between Cosmo and Cosmo Latina
  9. A large collection of weird free stuff (including a ladle, a collection of Kristen Stewart movies, and a backpack that looks like a cat)