REASONS I'D MAKE A GREAT ROOMMATE

Help, I'm moving to San Francisco and have nowhere to go. I'm about to be HOMELESS.
  1. I use the @list app. Already a good sign.
  2. I know everything about reality TV.
    I have knowledge you didn't even know you needed.
  3. I make the most INSANELY awesome Bachelor brackets.
    Literally I almost won a Pulitzer for them (not literally, but whatever).
  4. I always watch Harry Potter weekends.
    "Always." - Snape
  5. I love pizza and if I'm drunk I'll order it and forget to make you pay.
    Think of all the dolla dolla bills you'll save.
  6. I'm 22 in age, but 45 in spirit.
    In a good way, of course (?)
  7. I always pick the best movies on movie night.
    "Always." - Snape
  8. I'm so chill. Really, like I'm so chill I barely have a pulse. I'm practically dying.
    Someone revive me.
  9. I rarely bring home boys because my flirting skills are subpar and when I'm at the bar I'm usually more focused on where the nearest McDonald's is.
    Drunk food > drunk hookups.
  10. I will not judge you if you stay in bed all day.
    I'll applaud you.
  11. I will not ask you to run a marathon with me or join my women's softball league.
    I'm physically incapable of doing either of those things.
  12. I make cookies all the time and they're bomb AF.
  13. I enjoy long walks through target and wine straight from the bottle.
    This list might make me seem like an alcoholic, but I can assure you I'm not.