PICKUP LINES TO OLD MEN IN BASEMENTS

Theory: all funny great women on List are old men in basements. These are for you:
  1. Hey old man in a basement, storm's coming... Let's ride it out.
    Hot and heavy with strong gusts
  2. Hey old man in a basement, seems like you like spending time (*air quotes with fingers*) "downstairs."
    Hoarding? (Potential misspell)
  3. Hey old man in a basement, let's plan an inside job.
    Conspiracy theory-some
  4. Hey old man in a basement, what time is it?
    Doomsday? More like boomsday! Here comes the boomsday.
  5. Hey old man in a basement, what's your crush?
    Is it the weight of society? Is it the inescapable guilt that deception bears? Is it the sense of disillusionment, the pang of what-might-have-been if you weren't down in that basement all this time? You were once a young man in a basement, right? What happened? I'm here to talk, but I'm also here to listen. Let's heal together. Let us walk up those stairs and into a future. The world is bright, because of us - not in spite of us. What do you say, old man in a basement? Take my hand and join me.