ONLINE DATING 101: THAT AGE THO

  1. 18-26 yrs old: You know, their profile pic is a bathroom selfie, abs just rippling away. They have this intoxicating youthful look, high and tight hair cut, clean shaven (probably because they can't grow one in yet) and their style is on point. Excuse me, don't DO him! He won't be able to move on and his baby brain will be obsessed with you.
  2. 27-30 yrs old: Big boy man, with (hopefully) a big boy job and can (again, hopefully) know how to use. his. words. If this Tinder match actually matches I'm sure he will be able to show you a great time, the likelihood he will be ready to commit to something is slim. If you're willing, do it, but don't expect much. He just wants some fun.
  3. 31-36 yrs old: SWEET SPOT! This is the guy you want to date. He's grown past puppy love and inexperience, now he knows what to do and how to listen to you. Good luck finding a guy in this group. With my luck they've always been taken or realized by this point, he is in fact gay.
  4. 37-40 yrs old: Bow Chicka Bowwow. Yeah he knows where to make it count. But be aware he's going to be on the look out for a new wife and this will be his second or third time around. Make it a night & unmatch him ASAP. If you're ready to be step mom to Timmy, Tommy and Gus the Labradoodle then be my guest to keep that ship out of port.