BIRTH CONTROL PILL NAMES, RANKED

(of the ones I recently prescribed or refilled) Inspired by @sally 's list of meds that sound like comic book villains. I've always thought some drug companies did a good job creating names that sound girly. 👯 Are we that susceptible to their marketing schemes??
  1. 1.
    Yasmin
    And Yaz, her spunky side kick!
  2. 2.
    Jolessa
    Reminds me of Jolene
  3. 3.
    Levora
    Like a spell Hermione would do to her period
  4. 4.
    Seasonale/Seasonique
    These names are clever because the pills allow you to get your period only every 3 months/4 times a year. Bonus points for adding the girly "-ale" and "-ique" at the end.
  5. 5.
    Sprintec
    Sounds like fast technology for my uterus
  6. 6.
    Aviane
    Makes me want to fly and drink expensive water at the same time
  7. 7.
    Reclipsen
    The most bad ass name! Reclipsen should be an action heroine. I also see the clever insertion of "eclipse" in the name that reminds me of the moon and therefore, my monthly period.
  8. 8.
    Desogen
    Makes me think of Desitin ointment for diaper rash. But that also helps me remember that it's good for the skin since the desogestrel type of progesterone in this pill has low androgenic activity. That's why Dermatologists like it for patients with acne.
  9. 9.
    Lutera
    Sounds like a space station on the moon
  10. 10.
    Necon 7/7/7
    Sounds like a secret lab project
  11. 11.
    Ortho-Cyclen
    A classic, but booooooring 😴 One of the originals in alluding to the menstrual "cycle."
  12. 12.
    Portia
    de Rossi!
  13. 13.
    Nordette
    Too similar to Nicorette
  14. 14.
    Quasense
    Terrible. Makes me think, "What? This makes no sense."
  15. 15.
    Generess Fe
    Suggested by   @vickimarquette
  16. 16.
    Aubra
    Someone somewhere for sure has this on their baby name list.
    Suggested by   @magdalenam