THE STAGES OF SHOPPING FOR SKINCARE PRODUCTS AT SEPHORA

  1. 1.
    Exploration: "I'm just going to browse."
    Try some different products, see what's new, what's reasonably priced...
  2. 2.
    Judgement: "Wow, who would spend that much money on face cream? Crazies, that's who."
    This jar of fancy Korean skin moisturizer is more than double the price of my Shiseido one and quadruple the price of the Oil of Olay I used in college. Ri-dic.
  3. 3.
    Guardedness: "Avoid the sales guys doing demos. At all costs!!"
    Once I let them swipe a product on the back of my hand it's OvEr.
  4. 4.
    Relaxation: "Oh, but he's so nice and not pushy."
    Ok, he's fair. He doesn't have anything bad to say about the product I've got in my shopping basket. Sounds knowledgable...
  5. 5.
    Open mindedness: "No, I haven't tried this Korean line before."
    What's the harm in testing it out? I'm a totally discerning and analytical person. No one is going to dazzle me with the beauty equivalent of jazz hands and fog machine.
  6. 6.
    Conversion: "Wait, no--is this for real??"
    First, you turned that powdered enzyme into magic foam with water and then the moisturizer photoshopped my skin? Whaaaaat? Chris, you're freaking me out.
  7. 7.
    Justification: "I mean, in your 30s its all about maintaining, right?"
    And boy did my pores look gigantic in the mirror just now! Are those fine lines by my eyes??
  8. 8.
    Acceptance: "Ok, you convinced me. Ring it up!"
    At least I got enough points to qualify for several free gifts 😁