SHIT MY BROTHER SAYS

What a man
  1. "Butter is the booty of the kitchen"
  2. "What kind of creepy??"
    In response to the question of, "who is our creepy uncle??"
  3. "Simmer down pot roast"
    Alternately, "Simmer down gumbo"
  4. "If you weren't my sister and I was trying to be seductive..."
  5. "I think I'll go with the rich and creamy because I'm rich and creamy"
    On which box of mac and cheese he was going to make
  6. "I don't know what I'm thinking about"
  7. "And his children call him Doctor"
  8. "Epitome"
    Pronounced how it looks instead of how it is
  9. "You're like her and it's not just because you're a woman"
  10. "I know a lot about hair: it falls out"
  11. "That was pretty swish."
  12. "He's not a sidekick; he's more than that damnit. He has a name and it is Goose."
  13. "I feel like if I was a bird-themed super hero, I would use the catchphrase, 'You just got fowled.'"