EMBARRASSING BUT IMPORTANT THOUGHTS I HAVE ABOUT MY CATS ON A DAILY BASIS

  1. Are they happy
  2. Do they love me more than they love each other
  3. Would it be cruel to shave them to cut down on cat hair around the house
  4. Is my house a "cat house" now
  5. Is it inevitable that I must learn to like wearing white if I want to avoid going completely OCD over the cat hair on every piece of black clothing I own including my underwear
  6. Is our bed gross because there is an abundance of cat hair on it, the answer of course is yes, but is it really gross? Why is it gross on the bed but sweet and wonderful when it's on their bodies?
  7. Do they respect me
  8. Do my cats have a sexuality and is their obvious affection towards one another maternal, romantic, sadistic or just a "last cat on earth" type scenario
  9. Are my cats truly the cutest cats that ever lived
  10. Do my friends with (less attractive and clever) cats (or children) envy my cats
  11. Should I worry about burglars breaking into the house and upon seeing my cats deciding they're worthy of stealing as well
  12. Do I talk about my cats too much, post too many photos of them, are my cats more popular than I am, is that cool, is that pathetic?
  13. Should I get a third cat?