I have so many excuses for buying these crimes against footwear, but the fact is, I am the sad owner of all of them, and I can only blame myself.
  1. White Docs.
    Why? I am not 13. Or 2. My sister said they are like giant baby shoes. Hahahaha. I have yet to wear them.
  2. Air Pegasus
    The color. "They look like shoes Auntie would wear," my kids said. "But they're waterproof!" I said, and they laughed even harder at me.
  3. Black plastic Birkenstock Gizehs
    Disclaimer: I wear black Arizonas. I got these because I wanted all black, footbed, everything. But they're plastic. Total ripoff, and a size too big.
  4. The winner for the fugliest shoe designers go to Born.
    Oh my god. My excuse is I had not eaten all day. I actually wore them in Manhattan (once) where I bought them for way too much money because my Vans did not go w my outfit. Delirious. Wore them out of the store! Hahahaha! Pls note the double strap. I hate myself.
  5. "I wear New Balance sneakers to avoid a narrow path..."
    Got these at a children's shoe store on the LES when I regretted wearing flip flops in the rain. The toe is so fat on this design. They look pretty bad in person. Trust.
  6. Fug love. I sweat these so much.
    Because I live in Portland I can think these are stylish. The maker- LaTigo.