Stuff You Can Buy From My Non-Existent Vending Machine

  1. The Offbits
    Like Lego, but totally metal hardware.
  2. Mini Bug-Out Bags
  3. Soylent
  4. Tabletop Games
    Of course.
  5. Dorbz
  6. Stikfas
    My machine will reach back in time.
  7. Burner Cellphones
  8. Non-Lethal Weapons
    Because fuck waiting for the cops.
  9. Dickies
  10. Doc Martins
  11. Five Gum
    And ONLY Five gum.