Possible Locations for Upcoming 20 Year High School Reunion
It seems as though my graduating class has yet to determine the all-important where and when of our planned 20-year reunion. Here were my own ideas.
- •Ruins of Sheetz on Plank RoadWhere the cool kids spent many a night with their car engines all exposed and such. I managed to score an invite one summer night, but once I pulled up in my mom's turquoise Corsica, I was quickly expelled from the boulevard.
- •Ruins of Tasty Taco on Plank RoadFeatured prominently in several robberies perpetrated by different members of our graduating class (theoretical graduates, in the case of two of them).
- •Ruins of Park Hills TheatreStill currently operational, somehow.
- •Ruins of Emerging Technologies lab, where I was the first citizen of Altoona, PA to use the internet.I was the only person IN the class for months, as it was seen as a punishment for those who couldn't get through Astronomy without questioning the universe and making an ass of themselves in the Planetarium, though it was all done to distract their bully from punching them really hard in the arm and not at all representative of their views on space. That person once maybe wanted to be an astronaut. Instead they learned how to get into catfights with millennials on cell phone apps.
- •Jim's mom's house (abandoned after failed pyramid scheme)I almost did Seven Minutes Of Heaven there with Jim's cool aunt. They pushed us in there as a joke, but I was so ready.
- •Ruins of WPRR, the "cool" radio station in the middle of a field behind the ruins of a Chevrolet dealership.This wouldn't work, as it was but a small trailer next to a giant antenna, similar to The Wolfman's setup in American Graffiti, only much more modest and pathetic. Our graduating class would be much too large to fit in the trailer, but maybe outside and around the open field? Probably not, as even in its heyday, no one wanted to hang out there with me.
- •Ruins of Chuck E. CheeseMust check to see if photo booth is still on-site, as it can be used for either a Garden Of Formal Apologies or the Replica Locker Of Bully Retribution.