Advice I Wish I Had Gotten 10 Years Ago

  1. DON'T keep your iPod in your back pocket. It WILL fall into the toilet, and you WILL poop on it
    RIP IPOD. YOU ARE MISSED
  2. DON'T date the girl who has a boyfriend "back home." He will threaten your life at an amusement park
  3. DO spend more time with your mom. You don't know how precious that time is until it's gone
  4. DO get your fake ID earlier. There's money to be made from thirsty college students
  5. DO say yes to that..."situation." The opportunity will come up again, but it won't be nearly as fun as the first time could have been
  6. DO write originals. No one gives a shit about specs. Let that voice be heard
  7. DON'T worry about high school. No one else does once they leave
  8. DO care about sports. It's a universal language, and helps you fit in better
  9. DON'T eat cheesesteaks after midnight. You'll vomit your guts out
  10. DO keep your head up. Your life turns out fuckin' awesome