Fifteen Cute Animals to Distract You While My Cousin Robs Your Car

Just pay attention to the animals, and ONLY to the animals
  1. Bubbles thinks you should do a better job of hiding your iPod shuffle
  2. Little Gift wants you to know that your insurance company has a $200 deductible, meaning you'll have to pay for most of the damage out of pocket
  3. Bandit knows that you regret parking on the street instead of paying $7 for the lot
  4. Davey is so soft and cuddly, unlike the pool of shattered glass in your driver's seat
  5. Whiskers thinks that those Ray Bans will get him a lot of money from his fence
  6. Butterscotch is happy you're paying attention to him and not investigating loud smashing noises outside
  7. Cuddles will be a shoulder to cry on when you realize your laptop is missing
  8. Dozer wants to know if your car stereo is aftermarket and, if so, where did you put the faceplate
  9. Clip-Clop knows that my cousin needs the money more than you do
  10. Jeremy doesn't think calling the cops is a good idea. They'll probably just ignore petty larceny
  11. Diggs knows better than to leave his purse sitting out in the open where anyone could see it
  12. The Snuggle Squad are just happy that you're here with them. Enjoy the feeling while you can