1. I have a boner, but I'm sleepy
  2. I'm too stoned to play video games
  3. Jurassic Park III and Ocean's Eleven are on tv at the same time
  4. My Tivo's full of Bizarre Foods and Soccer
  5. All the stalls at the driving range are taken
  6. Football season doesn't start until September
  7. Trader Joe's doesn't carry my preferred brownie mix any more
  8. No more House of Cards until NEXT YEAR
  9. The dry cleaner's did a poor job of cleaning my favorite blanket
  10. My stuffed dog is smelly
  11. I ran out of good olive oil, so I had to make Brussels Sprouts with slightly worse olive oil