You Might Be a Millennial If...

  1. You recently moved back into your mom and dad.
  2. You've had a three month, sexual relationship with the 💕 Emoji.
  3. You went to college for something unique, like line-dancing or crying.
  4. Your cat is your soul-mate, which is why you know he's telling the truth when he orders you to murder Carson Daly.
  5. You can't even because your high school math curriculum was criminally inadequate to help students compete in a global market.
  6. You still have to ask your parents for plane tickets home to visit your second, secret family.
  7. You still haven't got the career you wanted, no matter how many goats you sacrifice to the demon moon.
  8. You eating an entire Bob's Big Boy statuette in a drug-fueled rampage got featured on Kylie Jenner's Snapchat.
  9. You completely changed how America feels about hot-button topics using only your intellect and the YouTube comments section.
  10. You believe that you will one day change the world for the better, despite 20+ years of evidence to the contrary.