THINGS I GET ASKED WHILE SHOWERING
I was asked three of these things today by two different children. While their father was in the house.
- •Can you get me a snack?Why yes, let me just grab the cheese sticks I keep next to the shampoo.
- •Can you help me find my missing Lego?No. Why? Because I am wet, soapy, and don't even have my glasses on.
- •Where is the dog/cat/sister/brother?I don't know, but you know where they aren't? Here. Beside me. Under the water.
- •Can you make [sibling] do/not do [insert literally ANY thing]?Depending on the thing, this is one I actually have to deal with. It usually involves yelling and squinting and lots of "What?... No, I'M IN THE SHOWER TALK LOUDER OMG."
- •Do I have to do that thing that Daddy told me to do?Yes. Daddy is in charge because I am in the shower. I am not in charge right now because the ONLY thing I can do is yell and condition my hair. For the next 10 minutes pretend I'm not here.
- •Can you find me socks?I. AM. IN. THE. SHOWER. Go find your father.