WHO I'VE BEEN WITH WHEN STUNG BY BEES

I'm allergic
  1. Dane Cook
    Yes, the man with a comedy routine of claiming he'd punch every bee in the face stood there and watched as I got stung in line at Disney Land.
  2. A hula skirt dancer
    I approached a pretty young lady in Hawaii after her hula performance. I was ready to make some slickety shwifty moves when I stepped on a dead bee and tried to act really cool as my mom cooed and pet me as we waited for my father to come back with the needed medications. Despite a swelling throat, I still went for the number. She couldn't understand me though.
  3. My best friend's sister
    During her wedding after party. She literally just got married. And someone had to shank me with an EpiPen
  4. My Mother
    My first bee sting was in a fucking stroller and my mom swat the bee while it was landed on me. Like what the fuck. Who does that.
  5. My ex girlfriend
    Unknown to me it was the day she would break up with me. But I happened to buy some tome when a bee stung me in the forearm. She ended things during my bedtime recovery.