Inspired by @Goldie
  1. I was really anxious about the anesthesia and as they were putting that gas mask on me I remember saying "this doesn't feel right."
  2. Cut to: me waking up. The room is golden and glowing. My mom says "how are you feeling" and I say "this was the best day of my life."
    I was on tons of morphine. It was hilarious.
  3. Blacked out in the elevator.
  4. Spent the next few weeks getting hooked on OxyContin. Writing poetry and having dreams that I was underwater with penises swimming at me.
    True story
  5. Getting off oxy was hellish, but I still recall that first moment of waking up in that orthodontist chair as the most heavenly moment.