I'm on a family vacation and my grandma is batshit crazy.
  1. Fly's are bitin'. Hope that doesn't mean rain's coming.
    I questioned her as to whether this was a saying or wives' tale and she told me that no, it just seems possible to her.
  2. Ah, yucker-doo.
    Yuck ➡️ Yucker ➡️ Yucker-doo. Used as an expletive.
  3. One day that cat keeled over and fell down a flight of stairs, and your mom cried "We have to do something!" but I just said... "Well, he's gone."
    Gram hated my mom's cat, Blackie (assuming and hoping he was a black cat).
  4. You could never name a cat "Blackie" these days. [Long pause] Or a person.
    Backstory: My grandma's best friend's name is Blackie. We don't know why.
  5. You know, I don't know when I started doing it. I've been buttering my buns since I can remember.
    She subsists on pastries and adds butter to all of them.
  6. I have a swig of pickle juice every night. That's the key to my long jeopardy.
    No word on her longevity.