Things I Thought I'd Never Say but Have Actually Said Working With Elementary School Students

Kids these days...
  1. We never solve anything when we spit on each other.
  2. He's having a hard day, the cafeteria ran out of grilled cheese.
  3. You need to ask people first before your smell them.
  4. I don't mind if you sing Taylor Swift, but you need to do it a little quieter.
  5. If these become weapons, I'm taking them away forever.
  6. Good news! It's bean burrito day!
  7. Put the dead frog back in the trash and do not touch it again.